Kiss with a Fist
by Akiru chan
Summary: Sometimes love consists of tender touches and affectionate kisses, and sometimes it can only be expressed with a well aimed punch to the jaw.


A/N - Written for the SasuNaru Exchange. It was inspired by the song 'Kiss with a Fist' by Florence and The Machines... hence the title. Hope ya'll enjoy!

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**Kiss with a Fist

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**

The bar was dark and hazed with an abundance of smoke. The atmosphere seemed to numb the senses more so than the alcohol. The chatter was nothing more than a low and monotonous hum, the cause of too many hours of sitting. A group hung in a corner, the birthplace of the smoke that filtered about. A big man puffed on a rolled cigar, while his companions suckled on cheap cigarettes. The haze around them kept them hidden within its grasp, the choking smell helping to keep others away.

Some loners sat nursing half-filled beers hoping for some companionship, but too accustomed to the life to seek it out themselves. A bar maid flirted kindly with one such man as she delivered a drink. He smiled as she left, happy for one kind action.

A loud roar of cheers broke the mundane stream of chatter as some bet was won. Crisp bills were soon distributed, leaving a few unfortunate souls broke for the night. This was a bar for all. Every unsightly human, no matter their history was welcomed here. It was a place for friends, and a place to be alone in ones despair. More than that, it was place to relax from the world and the harsh reality that came with it. When one's life consisted of death, murder, and always out-living your opponent a place like this was a much sought after reprieve.

Looking through the crowd of people, Naruto assessed that he had been in every patron's shoes at least once. He had been the lonely man hoping for some company, a face in a group of drunks and smokers, and even a victorious face from a won bet - though he lost more than he ever won. Tonight, though, he was neither. He was just a normal guy enjoying a drink with a long time friend. It was a sliver of peace in their hectic world and they would cling to it for as long as it was granted.

"The beer's watered down." The loud clunk of glass on wood snapped through Naruto's daze, bringing him back towards his company. Sakura sat hunched over the bar next to him. His glass had been emptied, leaving her slightly put-out.

Naruto eyed his own beer finding no similar complaint. Even if it was watered down, the alcohol was still pouring a pleasant buzz throughout his body. It helped to keep his mind blissfully blank for the time being.

Sakura ordered a heavier drink from the old bartender, her eyes glancing to Naruto's quickly emptying mug and ordering up another round of beer as well. When the man left to fix up their drink, Sakura turned herself fully towards her friend. Naruto could just feel her eyes assessing him and waited for the inevitable question. It would be like every other time, a conversation so well rehearsed that Naruto was sure they could recite it by heart.

Green eyes softened, and Naruto knew that it was about to come. He downed the rest of his beer, knowing his buzz would be quickly killed by the onslaught of reality. Naruto discreetly mouthed 'are you okay' in such a mocking fashion that he quickly felt guilty for the act.

"You're quiet tonight."

Naruto blinked, not expecting the almost flippant statement. The lack of prying words helped to calm the anxiety quickly crawling up his spin, keeping his back straight and tense. His shoulders visibly relaxed, and Naruto finally turned to face Sakura. A stiff smile settled itself on his face and he shrugged.

"Not much to talk about. You already know everything anyways." The words seemed to please Sakura for she smiled slightly.

"Well that's true." She waved her hand in his face, pink painted nails catching his eye. "Though there are some things I don't know. Many of which I _don't_ want to know." A soft chuckle accompanied her words, easing the atmosphere.

The bartender came back then, drinks in hand and a cigarette between his lips. Naruto choked on a cloud of smoke as his beer was placed in front of him. He waved the offending gas off, pulling his drink to his lips. The smooth liquid fell quickly down his throat to warm his belly. Sakura on the other hand ignored her drink in favor of watching Naruto.

He could feel her eyes on him, but chose to ignore it. It had been longer than normal that they had planned their usual weekly get together. Sakura had been busy, whether it was over time at the hospital or going out into the field on a mission. It didn't help that Naruto's missions tended to clash with Sakura's days off. It was nice to finally have the time to go out drinking again. God only knew that Naruto needed it.

"Naruto, are you okay?"

And there is was. The question he thought would go unasked for once. Naruto sighed, putting down his drink. He didn't bother to look at Sakura, not wanting to see those pleading eyes. It didn't take a genius to realize that something had been bothering him for more months than he would like to admit. If only the problem at hand wasn't so personal or confusing. Naruto didn't know where to start. A part of him didn't even want address the problem, the answers might not be to his liking.

A warm touch to Naruto's neck had his eyes snapping to his friend. Her eyes flickered to Naruto's face reflexively, before moving back to the tanned column of skin. The heated fingers grazed over marred skin and Naruto flinched away. Not too long ago Naruto would have found the gentle touch welcoming, leaning into it. At that time he would have rejoiced that it had been Sakura's touch to send goose-bumps over the expanse of his skin and a shiver up his spin. Now, Naruto only wanted that burning touch to be gone.

His mind flashed to cool, sharp medal running gracefully up his chest, across his throat. The thought of those soft hands on his neck turning rough and harsh had a light tremor shaking his body. Naruto wanted to deny how much his body's cravings had changed in only a few months. Blue eyes glazed momentarily, turning strawberry locks into dark brunette and emerald eyes to dark pearls.

"I'm fine." Naruto shook himself, turning back to his drink.

Sakura wasn't deterred, but she retracted her hand regardless. "How'd you get this? It's deep."

A smirk settled on Naruto's face despite himself. Trust Sakura to fuss over something so little. Naruto ignored the fact that it was less like a small scratch and more along the lines of a gash.

"Naruto," Sakura whined. "This is deep. You should have gotten this looked at." Her hands returned to his neck, pulling down his collar to see the full extent of the damage.

"I'm fine! It's just a little mishap from a mission." He finished his beer and waved on the bartender when he asked if Naruto would like another. At this point it was safer to keep his mind free of an alcoholic haze. His mind was already clouded; Naruto didn't feel the need to have a slip of tongue by boozing it up even more.

"Your last mission was a week ago." Sakura paused, poking at the tender skin. "This doesn't look more than a few days old." Her toned turned quickly professional and Naruto had to hold in a sigh of exasperation.

"It's just healing slow. I probably reopened it or something." He sent her a small smile. "You know how I am."

Sakura sent him a look like she didn't quite believe him. "Perhaps. Although this is pretty nasty for a kunai wound." Again her hands were on Naruto, and he wished she would just leave him alone and tend to her drink. She examined the gash again, giving it far more attention than Naruto felt comfortable with. "How close did you let the kunai get, Naruto? The way the cut is made, it's almost like you let them cut you." She eyed him disapprovingly but finally went back to her drink. Sakura mumbled to herself about idiotic males and took a large gulp of her mixed drink.

Naruto ordered himself up another beer, resisting the urge to request some shots of hard liquor. It didn't take much to rethink his previous decision to call of the drinks, not with unwanted memories coming to the front of his brain. Naruto couldn't help but wonder what Sakura would think if she found out just how close his attacker had been, and if it had been less of an attacker and more of a lover.

Somehow it had all started with a fight, most likely about something stupid. Lately Naruto had been finding any excuse to start a fight. Hits were exchanged, kicked were delivered and Naruto felt shame well within his chest as he knew that each attack only made him harder and harder. It never took long to feel the need pulsing along the length of his erection.

Then demanding lips were on his own, claiming and stealing Naruto's breath away. He loved those lips, loved their softness and strength, but more than that, Naruto loved the owner of those lips. Sasuke's lips. The realization of those feelings still made Naruto's heart thrum within his chest. Such feelings seem like a curse at the moment, leaving him alone and confused. Could love be tagged along with such violence? Could Naruto really call it love when he yearned for harsh hands while turning his back on the soft caresses of a gentle lover? Did love even exist at all?

Naruto remembered not caring as he felt the sharp edge of the kunai bite into his neck as Sasuke lost all composure as he came. Love could not exist in a moment so primal, so _unorthodox_ as that. It didn't matter, for the beauty of the moment made up for it. Seeing those lust-filled eyes widen in pleasure, accompanied with the hot white pain searing from the slicing kunai, felt like heaven.

Unfortunately it was only during those moments of passion that reality seemed to drift away, taking with it expectations and emotions better left buried. In such a place there was no need for love, for lust could suffice alone. Naruto's heart would not ache in shame knowing the unsightly acts he had participated in behind closed doors. Nor would his heart feel the agony of a loveless relationship, a coupling only sustained by physical pain, pain that left Naruto feeling more alive than ever before.

The soft click of another beer being presented in front of Naruto snapped him out of his memories, bringing him back to this world unreciprocated love and shame. His stomach turned at the site of the beer, and he pushed it towards Sakura who accepted it without question.

"How's Sasuke been?" Sakura asked between sips, the question giving away just how drunk she was getting. Sasuke had become a sore subject with the young woman. It was no secret that Sakura had over-romanticized Sasuke's return. She no longer deluded herself into thinking she would become the last Uchiha's wife, but she had hoped to reforge the bond that Team Seven had once held. Unfortunately too much had changed, too much innocence had been lost. Sasuke was no longer the same boy who had once thought Naruto to be a complete idiot. The thought was still there, Naruto was sure he could see the name calling in Sasuke's eyes, but the harsh words were nonexistent. It didn't help that Naruto and Sakura were not the same people they had once been either. Time had effectively built a wall between them, one that Sakura was unable to breech.

From the beginning it was blatant to see that Sasuke had no interest in rebuilding bonds. He kept himself isolated from the village, only interacting with others when missions asked it of him. Naruto had been the only one to top that wall, forcing himself back into the Uchiha's life through brass actions. He more or less moved in with Sasuke without the other's permission. Naruto just never got thrown out; he guessed Sasuke couldn't be bothered.

"He's fine. You know him, brooding and keeping to himself like always."

Sakura smiled, her eyes sad with longing. "We should hang out, just the three of us. Just like old times."

Naruto could sense the hope weaved within the words. He only wished Sakura would finally accept that Sasuke would never return to the person he once was. He would never allow Sakura close again. Naruto didn't want to be rude by saying such a thing out loud and to Sakura's face, but it was the cold truth. What hurt even more, was that the same was true for Naruto as well. Picking a fight with Sasuke was the only way to get the other man to acknowledge him, otherwise Naruto was just another unwanted face in the crowd.

"We should. This weekend maybe?" Despite himself Naruto could not tell her no. He could not be the one to douse the flames of hope within her. Sasuke would do enough damage himself; most likely to both Sakura and Naruto.

Sakura nodded, and they both found themselves heading into a pregnant silence - one that was over-ruled by the noises of the bar. But for the two of them, the silence was far louder than a jeer or a drunken shout.

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When Naruto left the bar the moon was nonexistent, hiding beyond the faces carved into the side of a mountain. It was late, but Naruto had no rush to hurry home to an empty house. Sasuke was gone again, some retrieval mission ranked as top secret. The bastard always got the best missions. All that awaited him at home was quiet furniture and the ramblings of his own mind. Naruto could really do without either.

The cool night air was calming, and it helped to cool his heated face. The alcohol in his system pulsed and Naruto knew that he had a nice buzz going on. He only hoped it would last until morning. Or better yet, if by some miracle it could last until after the weekend.

Naruto kicked at a pebble, sending it to bounce along in front of him. He kept it up, finding it soothing. He didn't want to think about how much this weekend was going to suck, or the headache he would no doubt get in trying to convince Sasuke to come. Naruto wasn't sure if the other man would even agree to begin with.

Too quickly for Naruto's liking, he was in front of the moderately small home that he shared with Sasuke; two rooms, a bath, kitchen, and living area. Everything they needed. Sighing he made his way into his home, and hoped for at least a dreamless night.

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Saturday morning came far quicker then Naruto expected. Friday had been a rather stressful adventure, that night being more than a minor headache. Why Naruto had decided to broach the subject of a day out with Sakura at the last possible moment was beyond him.

Sasuke had thoroughly ignored him for a good hour, till Naruto refused to let the other man into the bathroom for his nightly shower. Sasuke had given no affirmation that he was coming, but he had never said he wasn't coming either.

All that Sasuke had given Naruto was a quick beating and a rough pounding into the bathroom wall. The fact that Sasuke hadn't left Naruto in a rumpled pile on the floor after the quick fight was enough to give Naruto some thread of hope that Sasuke would come with him and Sakura the next day.

If anything the sex that followed was nothing more than a means of revenge for what Naruto was subjecting Sasuke too. He was sure that his ass would be in trouble once they got home as well if Naruto didn't watch his mouth around his friend.

The morning light was already filtering into the cluttered bedroom. Naruto squinted against it and buried his head deeper into his pillows. The fresh linen scent lulled him into a gentle snooze; it was still relatively early. He still had plenty of time to lay about.

The second time Naruto woke up that morning, it was to the stifling heat. The midmorning sun was blaring down and would not stand to see him sleep any longer. Naruto stretched out his muscles, each one sore from the night before. Still it wasn't as bad as it had been in the past. At least he could walk about and ignore the pain for the most part.

The hot shower helped to soothe his muscles just a little more, though he couldn't help but blush when he tip-toed around a pile of soiled towels that he knew were used to clean up Sasuke and himself the night before. He could just make out a spot of dry cum clinging to the dark material. Upon his exit, Naruto was sure to toss the offending objects into the laundry bin. Why Sasuke hadn't bothered to do it was a mystery to Naruto. Perhaps the man didn't feel the need to clean up a mess he figured to be Naruto's fault.

Naruto dressed quickly after seeing the time. He had less than an hour before they were to meet Sakura, and knowing Sasuke he would put up another fuss. Speaking of the bastard, he was current sitting on one of the plush couches while sharpening a set of kunai. Naruto's eyes narrowed are he recognized the set. Sakura had given them to Sasuke for his birthday, along-side Naruto's similar set. Normally it wouldn't bother Naruto to have gotten the same gift for Sasuke as someone else, but it hurt to see that Sasuke actually used the set Sakura had given him.

"What makes those so special?"

Sasuke slowed in his cleaning, the white rag stained with blood and unfamiliar substances that stopped its gentle stroking. Dark eyes looked up to meet Naruto's for a moment before going back to the task at hand.

"I mean, how come you use Sakura's yet you keep my locked up in your room?" Naruto tried again. He really wanted to understand the thinking behind that. If Sasuke didn't want the stupid things, then he could at least tell Naruto or give them away. It was pointless letting them sit around, collecting dust. Naruto had seen Sasuke give away presents he had received before, so why not just toss Naruto's to the side as well? At least then they would be put to good use.

For a moment Sasuke said nothing, finishing off the kunai in hand. Once it was placed onto the table with three out newly cleaned kunai, he spoke. His words were sharp, and blunt. "I lost one." It was short and sweet, and made no sense to Naruto at all.

Naruto eyed the group of kunai noticing that the once set of five had turned into four. He gave an exasperated cry of frustration. "That doesn't explain anything."

Sasuke just gave him a look that clearly said he thought Naruto to be an idiot. Apparently to Sasuke, that statement had made perfect sense, thought Naruto was loss to the meaning.

Instead of fighting over it, he mumbled quickly, "Just give them away if you don't want them." Though despite having said this all before, Naruto still knew them to sit atop Sasuke's desk. Naruto shook his head; he didn't need to start his day like this. "Are you ready? Sakura will be there soon. It's almost three."

Sasuke looked ready to argue, but resignation soon came over him and he stood. The act alone earned a small yip of joy from Naruto who ran to the kitchen to grab a banana to eat on the way over to the market. Sakura had wanted to go shopping, which seemed to be a woman's favorite pass time. Naruto didn't have the heart to argue, and agreed rather reluctantly. If anything, he might as well buy himself some new clothes for the winter; he had grown out of his old ones.

Unsurprisingly the walk was quiet, Sasuke staying close by and seemingly ignoring everyone - not that anyone bothered to acknowledge the man anyways. It didn't take long for people to realize that the last Uchiha would rather be a recluse than a functioning member of society. Naruto wasn't stupid, he knew that Sasuke didn't want to be here in Konoha. He figured there were too many harsh feelings and bad memories. It was mildly shocking how easily Sasuke stayed; during his probation Sasuke didn't try to escape once.

A part of Naruto believed that all Sasuke wanted to do was die, and the easiest way to realize that wish was to not live at all. Naruto couldn't call the life Sasuke lived as living. The only time he ever saw any emotion coming from his friend was during those heated fights and passionate nights.

"Naruto! Sasuke!" Naruto couldn't help but smile when he saw Sakura. She was waving them over by a stand at the beginning of the farmers market. By the look of things she was in the process of buying a few peaches. Naruto waved to her, while Sasuke followed along without a word.

Sakura's smile dimmed at the cold shoulder she was given, but brightened up as she was pressed to Naruto's chest in a tight hug. He couldn't let Sakura get herself down. The girl was meant to be bright and cheery. She toppled out of Naruto's arms, almost falling into Sasuke who smoothly avoided her. If it wasn't for Sakura's training as a shinobi she would have fallen flat on her face as she tripped over her own feet.

Naruto shot Sasuke a dirty look, but the other man wasn't even looking. He was too busy eying some tomatoes. No doubt they would be taking a bag full of the red fruit home with them. Naruto watched as Sasuke handed the stand owner some coins while he awaited his change. The older man fumbled a bit, dropping a silver piece onto the dirty ground. Quickly picking the coin up, he dusted it off and handed it back to Sasuke. Wrinkled old hands deposited the change into Sasuke's delicate ones while accidentally brushing the pale palm. Naruto had never seen Sasuke retract his hand so fast. Another coin fell to the floor with the sudden action. Sasuke ignored it, moving quickly back to Naruto.

Sakura didn't seem to take much notice to the event, although Naruto found it odd. It wasn't like he went out much with Sasuke, or if at all. There time was mostly spent together in the safety of their home. The more that he thought about it, Sasuke was the same around Sakura who found it far more appealing to let her fall to the ground than to pick her back up.

A bag was soon thrust into Naruto's face, and he came face to face with a bag of tomatoes. "Hold them. If I have to be seen here with you two, than at least hold this," Sasuke said. Naruto didn't bother to make a comment about how the man always held the bags of his woman. He didn't feel like getting hit. So instead, Naruto took the bag, making it a point to slide his fingers over Sasuke's as he did so. To his surprise Sasuke didn't even flinch.

Maybe he didn't even notice? At the moment Sasuke seemed to be too busy glaring down a group of young girls who seemed to be whispering and pointing their way. No doubt they were eying Sasuke. Sakura also seemed to be sending death vibes towards them. This was her day it seemed, and Naruto was sure that she would not let any other girls interrupt it. Not to mention this was the first time team seven had been able to get together in such a fashion. Training together was even harder to arrange.

"Come on. I need to pick something up at the Yamanaka's." Sakura headed off, pulling Naruto by the forearm.

Naruto squawked, reaching after Sasuke who walked just out of reach, a smirk on his face. The bastard was toying with him. Apparently tired of the squirming Naruto was doing, Sakura let go allowing him to stumble forward.

He ran face first into Sasuke's chest. The other man pushed him off quickly and threw him a sour look accompanied by a mumbled "idiot". There was nothing unusual about the action. It had happened multiple times due to Naruto's clumsiness. What did stick out in Naruto's mind was the difference in the way Sasuke treated Naruto opposed to others. It had never struck Naruto before. He probably wouldn't have realized it even today if he hadn't of been keeping a closer eye on the interaction between Sasuke and Sakura in hopes of find some bond being reformed. Instead it seemed as if he was teetering on the edge of an epiphany.

Naruto walked in silence the rest of the way to the flower shop. His mind was too full, going back to the night when he had sat next to Sakura at the bar. Dark emotions billowed forth, and Naruto fought them back. It wouldn't do to worry about things such as those at a time like this. He eyed Sasuke for a moment. Seeing the way the man stared right back, almost pleading, Naruto for something. To leave him alone? To never let go? Anything could be possible. Either way Naruto believe he was looking far too close into this. So what if Sasuke allowed Naruto's touch? It would be hard for him to beat Naruto into a bloody pulp or to fuck him if Sasuke didn't want to touch the other.

Naruto walked into the flower shop his mind, still wandering despite himself. He knew there was a reason why he wasn't perceptive while not on missions. It always caused him to open a can of worms. Perhaps why Sasuke allowed Naruto's touch was because he was used to it. So many years they had spent exchanging blows. In a way all they were used to the violent touch of the other. Naruto froze at the thought.

It was all Sasuke knew. Violence was all Naruto had ever experienced with Sasuke, all even _he_ ever knew. Never before had he even tried to touch Sasuke with a form of affection. Truth be told Naruto didn't even know how he would go about doing it. To him, a fist to the face could be the equivalent of a kiss. Just as much passion went into both it seemed. Could that mean…?

Naruto looked towards Sasuke, who quickly averted his gaze. Could he really be such an idiot that Naruto never realized just what had been happening between the two of them for the past month or so? He couldn't even remember when it started now; his mind was too clouded with the sudden possibilities.

A smile blossomed on Naruto's face. He was such an idiot. Here he claimed to be Sasuke's best friend, but in truth it seemed as if he didn't know the other man well enough.

Seeing that Sakura was busy chatting with Ino about a new herb or something that they were growing for her, Naruto made his way to Sasuke who had found interest in a simple African Violet. Oddly enough it was the same deep dark blue as his eyes.

If Naruto's theory was correct, and he prayed that it was. Then it was only a matter of time and patients to learn the tender love that Naruto thought he could never receive from nor give to Sasuke. Who would have ever thought they were both so emotionally retarded that they could not figure out how to properly show affection? All they knew was how to express themselves through their fists.

Taking the lead, Naruto settled besides Sasuke. His heart was beating harshly within his chest. There was still a very large chance that his theory was wrong, but Naruto was ready to finally know the truth. Taking a deep breath, his hand reached out, searching for the warm hand of his friend. Fingers brushed, and then quickly entwined.

Naruto felt Sasuke quickly jerk back and his heart jumped in anxiety. Though before Naruto could full wrap himself into his despair, the hesitant touch of fingers returned. They gently, almost shyly, wrapped back around Naruto's and held them tight.

The smile that settled on Naruto's face was almost blinding. He had been right! For the first time, Naruto felt a pleasant warmth flow through him, tickling all the way down to his toes. Was this love? Could this be the beginning of something new and profound?

Naruto couldn't be sure where this would lead, but one thing was sure. This was the first step to something new. He doubted he could ever call what he and Sasuke had love, or if the word could even do justice to the feeling Naruto felt as he held Sasuke's hand. If anything, this bond between them would grow as they learned that affection could be shown through more than just fists and crushing kicks.

There was still a long road ahead, and Naruto wasn't sure of everything just yet. If anything was certain, it was that Naruto was ready to face this head first, and alongside Sasuke. He would take the good with the bad, and understand that sometimes a fist to the face was the equivalent to passionate kiss. After all, they were Naruto and Sasuke, that was just how they were, and nothing could ever change that.

Quickly Naruto squeezed Sasuke's hand once more, while turning to face him. Throwing caution to the wind, he leaned up and pecked Sasuke on the cheek. The other man just snorted.

"Idiot."

Naruto just laughed.

* * *

-_The End_-


End file.
